Updated September 3rd 2024
I think we’ve all heard the phrase “you can’t pour from an empty cup”. And when you’re a mom, it’s real easy to let your cup empty. And one of the easiest ways to care for yourself is often overlooked by most new moms I work with (I know I overlooked the first tip I’m about to share with you when I first became a mom).
I think it’s overlooked because it’s super basic but we’re always putting someone else’s needs before our own so we can easily miss it.
The experience I had becoming a mom and transitioning to breastfeeding with my firstborn is the entire reason I became a Lactation Consultant to help other moms because I struggled a lot not only with breastfeeding but with finding the time to care for myself as well. And not caring for myself began to significantly impact my breastfeeding journey in more ways than one.
Over the years, I’ve found many ways to support myself as a mom with super easy self-care that I find also really help while I’m nursing and I’m going to share them with you in this blog post.
Self Care Tip #1: EAT ENOUGH and HYDRATE ENOUGH
Sounds simple right? But this one can actually be challenging sometimes. Eating enough calories is essential to not only healing your body but also producing enough milk for your baby AND helping your body manage it’s response to stress.
Lactation is a nutritionally expensive task for your body meaning it uses about 20 calories per ounce of milk produced! That’s an average of 500 extra calories a day to make enough food for your baby. PLUS you’re recovering from birth (and if you had a c-section you’re recovering from birth AND surgery), and likely depleted in essential vitamins and minerals that went to growing your beautiful baby
My tip: EAT whenever the baby eats. Get a snack with protein, fat and fibre into your body each time you nurse or pump for your baby
You also want to drink enough fluids
Breastfeeding increases thirst for most people. You can thank the love hormone, oxytocin, for that one. Drinking enough water is essential for your body to stay hydrated and produce milk for your baby. It also affects your energy levels, believe it or not!
My tip: Keep a reusable water bottle in each room and have your partner (or postpartum doula) be in charge of filling them for you. Drink whenever you’re thirsty or whenever you feed your baby.
Remember that teas, bone broths, soups, and high water fruits and vegetables all count towards your hydration too!
Self Care Tip #2: Boxed Breathing
Stress impacts all areas of your life. And let’s be honest, most of us are under some kind of stress. But whether there is a physical threat to your life or not, your body PERCEIVES the stress the same way
Being a new parent is hard and stressful. Recovering from birth, caring for a newborn (and possibly older children), interrupted sleep, pumping/nursing around the clock – it’s stressful on your body. Not to mention the stress of parenting in general, finances, balancing breastfeeding and back to work. It’s a lot! And stress hormones negatively affect oxytocin.
Oxytocin is a very important hormone that is responsible for your milk being able to flow. Oxytocin squeezes the muscles around the milk sacs to push it out of the nipple. If you’ve ever felt like you couldn’t “get a let-down” or suddenly your baby is becoming very frustrated at the breast, check in with yourself first before hitting google.
How are you feeling at that moment?
- Safe?
- Rushed?
- Overwhelmed?
- Angry?
- Sad?
Anyone of those could impact your oxytocin levels!
Something I teach just about all of my clients is boxed breathing
Also known as square breathing, this technique forces you to slow down and focus on your breath. It’s a great way to reset and regroup in moments of stress and frustration and you only need a few seconds
I’m not a professional teacher when it comes to boxed breathing but have personally used this technique myself and had clients used it as well. Here’s how you do it…
- Take a deep belly breath in for 4 seconds…
- HOLD this breath for 4 seconds…
- EXHALE for 4 seconds…
- HOLD for 4 seconds…
Feel your shoulders relax, your neck softening, your jaw unclenching.
Repeat as many times as needed.
I like to use a variation of this where you breathe in for 4, hold for 4 and exhale for 6 and then repeat. But there’s many different variations
So how can you incorporate this into your busy day?
You can practice this technique when
- You first wake up
- While you’re pumping
- When your baby is cluster feeding
- When your baby is crying and you can’t figure out why
- When you need a break
Self Care Tip #3: Let The Oxytocin Flow
When oxytocin (aka the love hormone) is released, it causes the muscle cells around the milk sacs in your breast to squeeze and essentially push the milk out of your nipple
Things that help oxytocin to flow, will help with your milk release AND help you to feel calmer and more relaxed
This is one reason why feeling comfortable in the environment you are nursing or pumping in is important for milk release. Your physical comfort also matters when it comes to oxytocin flowing
Other ways you can support your milk to abundantly flow include:
- Looking at pictures or videos of your baby while pumping
- Back rubs
- Laughing
- Snuggling your family pet
- Eating chocolate
- Kissing your partner
- Music
- Meditation
Doing these things before nursing or pumping where you can (or some of them during such as eating chocolate and listening to music) can help you feel calmer and more relaxed which naturally supports your milk to flow which can help your supply*
Because when milk flows and is removed often, your body then makes more
*If you’re currently struggling with your supply I would suggest working with an IBCLC to help you. You can book a consult with me here
A Quick Recap of Self Care Tips
- Eating enough food and hydrating your body is a very simple act of self-care that goes a long way as a new mom
- Boxed breathing (or a variation of it) can help ground us in moments we’re feeling overwhelmed and help calm us – and it costs nothing to practice daily
- When we’re stressed, it’s harder for oxytocin to be release and doing things to help the oxytocin flow (like music, laughter and smelling our babies) helps you feel calmer, more relaxed and less stressed
Alex Wachelka is an International Board Certified Lactation Consultant and mother of two. She is the founder of Motherhood Blooms Lactation, a private practice dedicated to helping mothers feel seen, heard and validated while helping them reach their breastfeeding goals.